Me; *having a rough day, because the world is A LOT* Middy Spoon: MOMMY! MOMMY! COME HERE! VERY IMPORTANT! *Chomps my arm and drags me to the dog futon* Me: Middy, do I really need to sit down here? Middy: YES OMG SUPER IMPORTANT!!!! SIT RIGHT HERE!!!! RIGHT HERE, OLD MOMMY!!!! Me, mangled but curious: oookay? I'm sitting? Middy: SNEAK ATTACK!!!!! *throws entire self on my head, knocking me over and profusely licking my face* Me: blargle! *Struggling to breathe* Middy: I LOVE YOU OLD MOMMY! *lick lick chomp lick* Dogs. Somehow making the world better, despite humanity's worst efforts.
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0 7 0 9 5 2 4 0 1 i 7 3 2 6 i y 1 , M · Shared with Friends; Except: Acquaintances Me: *morel hunting in the yard* Middy: YAY OUTDOOR TIME WITH MOMMY! *races laps* Me: Hmm, I should check out that grassy lot across the street (used to be a house, but lack of infrastructural support led to it being flooded). *walks down alley outside fence* Middy: HOORAY I CAN RACE THE OLD MOMMY! LOOK HOW FAST I AM, MOMMY! *gets to end of fenceline* *watches me cross the street* Old....old Mommy? Old Mommy, where are we going? *watches me step into the neighboring yard, where I discovered some of my hostas transplanted by random bulldozing* OLD MOMMY? WHY YOU NO TAKE YOUR MIDDY SPOON?? Me: Middy, you're fine. I'm going to be right over here. I'll be right back. Middy: OOLLLLD MOOOMMMMMMYYYYYYY???? WHY YOU ABANDON YOUR MIDDY SPOOOOOOOONNNNNN???? OLD MOMMY? OLD MOMMY? ARE YOU GONE FOREVER OLD MOMMY??? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY??? *as I walk, clearly visible, for about 3 minutes* OLD MOMM...