Me: *driving down alley*

Random dog running loose: YAY IMMA FREE DOG!!!
Me: *parks car, gets out* Middy! Get back in the yard! *puts Middy in the gate, rounds Schmoop into the house for lockdown, looks for Middy...*
M (from outside fence, 5 seconds after I put her in): FREEEEEEEEEEE!!!! HEY LOOK STUFF!!!!
Me: *follows Mephitidae, trying to get close enough for grabbing*
Middy: HELLO NEIGHBORS HOUSE CAN I COME IN??
Middy: HELLO STREET!
Middy: HELLO OTHER HOUSE I SNIFF YOUR BUSHES!
Me (Voice of Absolute Doom): M.E.P.H.I.T.I.D.A.E. YOU POLITE SIT *NOW*
Middy: *polite sit*
Me: *picks up 60+ pound puppy to carry her two blocks home*
*grunt* How are you SO HEAVY?
Middy: IMMA TEENY!
Me: *grunt grunt heave grunt old*
Middy: *head snuggling as she's carried because adventures are exhausting and old mommies are safe* I LOVE YOU OLD MOMMY!

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